Jesse van der Velde - Are you spiritually bypassing?

017 – Truth

In a world where opinions are so diverse and where our governments are telling us what to believe, it can be difficult to separate the wheat from the chaff. Yet the more we are pushed to believe someone else’s story or belief, the more we are then pushed to ask ourselves, “What do I believe in all of this?” Join me in a special teepee meditation of The Spiritual Game of Business Podcast as we delve deeper into the question, “What is your truth?”

Click here to listen to the episode on Spotify.

Life’s Biggest Question

As I record this podcast (listen here), I am sitting by the fire in my teepee and remember that it is the fire that reminds us who we are. For generation after generation, we have sought answers from the fire’s mysterious spirit. And if we are willing to remain open and vulnerable – the fire will always reflect that which we need to see in ourselves.

It was around the fire that I myself finally got to see who I am. Because for so many years, I went through life searching: searching for what I wanted to do, searching for who I was, and searching for what would fulfill me. For so long, I never found the answers I sought – but I still walked the path. And ultimately, this is the only thing you can truly do in life: to just walk your path – to just do what is ahead of you, to do what is asked of you, and to do what inspires you.

So for me – it was that first night in the teepee, when the shaman asked me, “Jesse, what is your truth?” that I understood an important life lesson: until the day comes that we are able to answer the question, “What is my truth?” we will go on with our life living someone else’s truth. 

Essentially, we will continue to go through life living a lie of who we are. 

I was Living a Lie

This might sound harsh, that you might be “living a lie.” You might even feel resistance to this statement and declare, “No way, I’m not living a lie.” 

But let me ask you this: do you know your truth?

For many years, I was living someone else’s truth because I didn’t know mine!

And for that reason – simply because I wasn’t living my own truth – I was living a lie. 

I’ve shared with you that, for eight years, I was in a business relationship – a business partnership that, in many ways, could be perceived (in retrospect) as unconstructive.

We were two partners in conflict. 

But to play “devil’s advocate” – this partnership could also be seen as having been very constructive because it was ultimately what pushed me to learn and heal. 

I looked at my business partner as my business mentor: he was 30 years older than I and had so much experience from having built a big business. I looked up to him and I wanted to learn from him – so I listened to him. 

I listened to his ideas of how to move forward, of what to do – and without questioning, I just followed along.

And even though I was following the path, I wasn’t always sure that I was making the “right” decisions.

Afraid to Make the “Wrong” Choice

I followed my business mentor blindly without having any firm opinions or making any major decisions. I was afraid to make the wrong choice – that I would fail in his eyes. So for me, it was easier to follow without rocking the boat.

But deep down, I knew that I had opinions about the future of the business – I just wasn’t able to express them. In fact, I was afraid to express them.

Even though sometimes we may think we made the “wrong” choice in life or in a situation, in the end, what matters is that you made a choice.

NOT making a choice; dabbling through life; being indecisive; not being able to choose; following other people – these are also decisions, but they will always be the wrong decision.

And for me, avoiding confrontation and being afraid to “rock the boat” was a choice in and of itself, and for sure, it was the wrong choice. Because consequently, I never stopped to ask myself: “What do I believe the course of this business needs to be? What do I believe is the right step for this business?”

I wasn’t expressing my truth. I wasn’t expressing my beliefs. I wasn’t expressing what I stood for. And for that reason, I wasn’t living my truth.

What is Your Truth?

On that first night in the teepee, when the shaman asked me: “What is your truth?” – I didn’t know what that question meant. I didn’t know how to answer that question: “What does it mean?”

It can be asked in so many different ways. It can be answered in so many different layers.

The essence of all of this is to ask ourselves is:

  • Who am I in my life? 
  • Who am I in the current world circumstances? 
  • Who am I in my family? 
  • Who am I in my relationship with my husband or wife?
  • Who am I in relation to my children?
  • Who am I in relation to my colleagues?

What is my truth in that? And for a large part, living your truth is expressing what you feel.

For example, if you are in a conversation – or even in a conflict or fight with your spouse – lovingly expressing your feelings through carefully chosen words is the best way to communicate your truth.

“This is what I’m currently feeling. I don’t know whether it is the right thing; I don’t know whether I will still be feeling this in a day from now. I’m just sharing this because it is what I’m currently experiencing. The only thing that I can do is express what I’m experiencing, so I am going ahead and living what exists in this current moment.”

In those conversations, it’s important to stay close to yourself and avoid projecting. Use harmonious words so that you are kind to the other person and kind to yourself.

The more that we can take responsibility and accountability for our words and feelings, the purer they will be and the more it will advance the conversations that you have.

When in a difficult conversation, can you:

  • Stay close to yourself
  • Maintain softness, kindness, and respect for yourself and the other person
  • Avoid blaming the other person
  • Avoid letting negative emotions overflow…
  • …but if they do – can you connect with them and allow them to be, without projecting?

Be a Participant & an Observer

This style of communication is an ability to develop, and the first place to begin is through our breath. It’s the ability to breathe through our emotions, through what is happening inside of us, and to then observe this from above.

To not just be in the conversation, but to also be the observer of the conversation.

To be able to step out of the conversation to observe what is happening within you, within someone else, and between the both of you.

Be both the participant and the observer in a conversation. Because through this, you will be able to find the answers to the question, “What is my truth in this conversation?”

And ultimately, you’ll be able to find the answers to life’s bigger question: “What is my truth….in LIFE?”

Cutting out the Noise

In a world where opinions are so diverse –

When there is so much going on in our outer world in regards to the whole big “C-virus” –

Where our governments are telling us what to believe –

Where big data is censoring whatever opinions are not aligned with the WHO, or with the government’s story – 

The more someone pushes their beliefs or story on us, the more we must stop and think, “What do I believe in all of this? What is my truth in this entire situation?”

The greater the external resistance in our lives, the bigger the opportunity is to go within and explore our own truth.

What is your truth during these times that we live in?

Are these times merely a coincidence? 

Will this be over in a few weeks when we get the vaccine, with everything going back to “normal?”

Or, are these times of transitioning? Maybe even awakening?

What is happening on a global scale?

Why are people being put inside their houses?

What is bad about this, but also, what is this an opportunity for?

Looking Within

When we are given no other option but to follow someone else’s opinions and stories – the only thing we can do is look within and ask ourselves:

  • What is the dream that I am dreaming for myself? 
  • Am I going to let someone else’s story dictate my future? 
  • Or through this, am I going to wonder: what am I going to dream and believe about my life?

If someone has a strong idea of how the future of Earth needs to look, you are invited to truly and strongly determine, for yourself, how YOU wish to see the future of this Earth.

That is what we call, “Dreaming the world into being.”

  • What is the future of Earth that YOU see? 
  • What is the future that you see for your own life?
  • What is the future that you see for humanity? For Earth?

Become very aware of what place inside of yourself you are dreaming this future.

  • Are you dreaming it from fear?
  • Are you simply deciding, “I don’t have any influence on this at all, anyway…” (said by 7 billion people…)
  • Or, are you going to decide: “This is my truth in all of this. Here’s what I am dreaming. Here’s what I’m bringing to the people around me. Here is how I’m expressing my voice.”

It is all a major process.

The most important thing for you to do is to be very aware of where you are currently at in your own process. To walk that and understand that. To just walk ahead. To, in every moment, decide what it is you want to live inside of you.

Regardless of what is happening in the outer world, can you connect with that place within that is light, that is love, that is joy?

Because that is the true place from where life is found and created. And from there: what do you dream for the future? What do you see? What is the life that you want to create for yourself? For your family? And for humanity? It is in these times that we are asked to very consciously dream what we believe in. To stop thinking that we don’t have any influence. Because we DO. And YOU do. You are a creator.

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